Who Needs Stainless Steel Appliances, Anyway?

“Spiritually speaking, we are all nesters, wanting to nestle in and experience love.”

Are you building your nest?

At 44 years old, I can finally say,”YES!”

Well, in a way that meets my models.

After leaving my thirteen year relationship and having lived in a more opulent way, I recently moved to San Luis Obispo. To the surprise of many, the transition couldn’t have been more perfect. I didn’t say “easy”.

I have never created more peace. This humble abode by the lake is just what the doctor ordered. I call it “Our Sanctuary” to my seven-year-old. It is our quaint space, with maple hardwood floors and white cabinets adorned with our favorite things. Our sanctuary is to be treated as such: making beds in the morning, while keeping it clean and clutter free. A quieter, more simple, vacation-like home that says, “Welcome. Please enter and feel the sunshine in your bones. Breathe. Relax. It is all going to be ok and is ok.” 

I have imagined my living space like this for as long as I can remember, even as I continued to collect and hoard in each home I lived in. With each push of a closet door or slam of one-too-many junk drawers, I experienced just another added weight of responsibility, never mind wondering what was growing underneath my bed.

But, if you came to visit? One would not have a clue.

Much like my outer appearance, the home did not reflect the anxiety I was continually creating on the inside. Call it the “Good Opinion Of People”! (Or, for short, the G.O.O.P.) As long as I looked as though I had it together, I tricked myself into “thinking” that I did. But, did I?

Nope. And, I still don’t. It’s all a part of the journey. AND, I am creating a sense of self worth that I did not know could be claimed here on this crazy planet, learning how to bless my heart for every challenge that shows itself. I have no doubt that God’s honing me to claim my light and be what all the great masters promised was possible while still living in our human shell. To be an example to YOU, my readers, that you are “powerful beyond measure.” You are here to claim your strength, too. This I know for sure: if I can do it… YOU can do it. 

“It is an inside job.” We hear this trite saying continually, and how often do we actually do what it takes to go through the pains of growing up? Our bones ache; and yet, we are taught to protect our hearts with barriers of steel. We stop feeling. We “think” we are tough, as we puff out our chests, shaking our fists, saying, “Don’t F**k with me!” Saying this energetically, or out loud, is proving how fearful we really are, although our egos convince us otherwise. We are really playing small. If we are claiming our strength, we don’t need to appear strong.

So I build my nest from the inside out. I build a place for all the great masters to rest their feet.

What will they say to me amongst all the candles and pillows?

“No need to try so hard, Kathleen. You had me before, ‘Hello.'”

With all my heart,
Kathleen