As I sit tonight watching continuous news coverage of the storm known as Hurricane Sandy sweep across the east coast, I can’t help but think about the role distance and time plays in relationships throughout our lives. I was born and raised in New York and moved to California ten years ago to start a new life for myself that would be different from all that I had known. I was ready for a new adventure and wanted to leave where I came from behind.
As with anything new, adjusting can be difficult and emotional. I remember feeling afraid and homesick, wondering if I would ever feel at home in this new place I chose to live. I visited New York often at first, grasping to maintain a link to the comfort of my past. Over time though, as I became more comfortable with my new environment and became more settled, my desire to return home decreased. I found myself visiting less often and felt the emotional connection to my past dissolve. I went from being a New Yorker that lived in California to being simply a Californian.
So much time has passed since I moved, yet it takes only one event like this to make me feel deeply connected to the place I chose to leave so long ago. I have been glued to the news reports all day long, worried about the safety of all of my family and friends who are being affected. I feel helpless as I sit on the other side of the country, unable to do anything to offer my assistance to them. For the first time in a long time, I long to be back in this place I used to call home. I am flooded with memories of my childhood that I haven’t thought of for so long, if ever. I long to be a New Yorker.
No matter how far we go, what I am realizing tonight is that a part of us will always remain linked to where we come from. Knowing that the people I love and the place I once loved are facing disaster, I can not help but feel as though none of that time has passed by and I am right back there in the middle of the storm with them all. My heart aches and my emotions are high, feeling as though I never really left at all. Yet I did, and all I can do right now is sit and wait and offer my love and light to them from across the country. You are all in my heart; you are all in my prayers. Be safe.